oh its September~

i see myself visiting this page of mine
wen i'm down
its been months since i last poured out here
plain lazy i guess

here we go...
was asked to gather pics of my dad from previous years
as the church wana compile it
for his farewell dinner power point
as i click thru those albums
i stumble on pics of Grandpa
& pics of me & cousy at the hosp waiting
in the middle of the nite
something strike me hard
felt so hard to breathe
not oni those pics made me real sad
others like mum's pic last whole year

a HORRIBLE year as i wud summarized it
i juz turn 21 & expect it wud be a year of fun
turned out to be an opposite 1
i still cudnt get it off my mind

i still miss him dearly
by juz thinkin of him cud get tears rolling down my cheeks
prolly i cud be an actress aft all this shit
=)

another depressing story
parents moving out from sp
& alot of ppl been telling me hw happy dey wud see me often
in da new church
gah!im findin a way to Run Away!!!
sometimes i do hate the fact of who i am
its like a Force to stay at the church wer my parents go
its so awfully unfair
cz ders no one my age!!!!
i'll be so blardy bored & i wud get duties every single damn week!
yes i hate to commit in things like this
cz since young
i dun hav a CHOICE

sorry for all the stupid rant~
my bad..
signing off